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Zam Walker does some whole body theology
Do you honour your body as a temple of the Holy Spirit? Do you rejoice
at the wonder of your creation? Do you like your body? If you are a
woman, do you see yourself as being made in God's image? These questions
have kept surfacing for me in recent years and have led me to reflect on
body theology.
As a result I have developed a workshop entitled 'The body says what
words cannot', a quotation from Martha Graham the American dancer and
choreographer. I encourage people to reflect on how their bodies tell
their stories and connect with their faith. Inevitably with my personal
experience, and my commitment to feminist theology and spirituality, the
workshops primarily engage with women.
Because of this, during the past year I have been asked to be the
keynote speaker at a number of meetings of the Church of Scotland Guild,
on the theme of 'Honouring the Body'. This is the first of their
three-year programme 'Mind, Body and Spirit'. For too long we have dis-integrated
ourselves and been guilty of thinking only the spiritual matters. We are
spirit, mind and body and the physical is intrinsic to the spiritual.
Our body is our point of contact with the world and the means by which
we experience life. Central to Christianity is the belief that God came
in Jesus to share our humanity, bless our physical world and transform
us into what was intended in our creation: to live in love and peace and
justice. He touched people and fed their bodies, minds and souls,
teaching his followers to do the same.
'I have flabby thighs, but fortunately my stomach covers them.'
Joan Rivers
Many folk are uncomfortable with discussing bodies in general or
thinking about their own body in particular, especially within a
'church' context. With a largely female audience I use quotations, not
to put men down but to build women's self-confidence and affirm them.
'Remember Ginger Rogers did everything Fred Astaire did, but she did
it backwards and in high heels.'
Faith Whittlesey
The media are full of headlines obsessed with bodies. In one week I
counted 42 hours on the terrestrial channels devoted to changing
appearance or trying to be something or someone else. Most were
programmes where the external was changed without any attempt to address
lifestyle issues. A minority were about strict changes in lifestyle, to
enable people to be the healthiest they can, without concentrating on
weight or size. For Christians the latter is theologically better -
aiming to value people in all aspects of their life, while enabling them
to be the best they can be.
A Working Party report on the Impact of Hospice Experience on the
Church's Ministry of Healing says the essence of sin is 'other people
telling me who I am and I believing them'. When we fail to challenge
false images of who we are that is a denial of our God-given uniqueness.
We can end up making ourselves ill.
Of course the other side of the coin is to enjoy playing with roles,
dressing up and having fun, but not to lose sight of our individuality.
'I'm not offended by all the dumb blonde jokes because I know I'm not
dumb - and I'm also not blonde.'
Dolly Parton
There are now size zero and even double zero clothes. As a feminist I
find this extremely worrying. What does this say about us? That we want
to be invisible, to be nothing? The obsession with being thin is obscene
when people are starving. And what is it doing to our children?
Even girls as young as five are being sexualised in matters of clothing
and toys. Barbie seems quite innocuous compared to the aptly named Bratz;
in both cases impossible figures are held up as the ideal. Barbie would
never be able to stand up in real life and Bratz dolls are (pre)pubescent
'Lolitas' without noses!
This tyranny of thinness and obsession with youth (which ironically
deprives children of childhood) has implications for us all. In addition
to the multi-million pound diet industry there is big business in
anti-ageing products, which also attempt to get us to deny who we are.
'Do not deprive me of my age. I have earned it.'
May Sarton
If we are honest and relaxed we can cope. Try thinking of a woman in the
public eye who you think is gorgeous. My choice is Dawn French, someone
who seems at ease with herself, and looks as if she would be good
company and enjoy her food. Ask yourself what is your favourite part of
your own body - mine are my feet and my eyes. At what age have you felt
best in your body? My answer would be I feel best now! How do you
decorate your body? I use necklaces, rings, earrings, a nose stud,
tattoos and sometimes make-up.
My story can be told through the journey of my body, its marks and
scars, some chosen and some inflicted: accidents, abuse, stretchmarks
through pregnancy and operations. We decorate those parts of our bodies
that we like but do we consider why, for example, people have their ears
pierced or the meaning of any tattoos they have?
I have three tattoos. The first, decorating my foot, marked a
significant stage over 20 years ago. The second marked my engagement to
my husband - we each had a tattoo instead of an engagement ring. The
third is what I call my resurrection tattoo. It is a spiral by my
collarbone which joins the dots of my radiotherapy tattoos. Together
with my mastectomy scar it is a constant visible reminder of the gift of
new life. Having cancer certainly puts life into perspective!
'Cancer got me over unimportant fears, like getting old.'
Olivia Newton-John
One reason why my interest in body theology has emerged is due to my
experience of having cancer. When diagnosed, just after my 40th
birthday, I was given the option of a lumpectomy or mastectomy. I opted
for the latter as having two young children I did not want to be back
and forth for surgery. I was offered reconstructive surgery which I
refused as inappropriate since this would have been a way of denying
reality. It is not as if feeling would be restored, and anyway who would
it be for? I am not ashamed of having cancer and I am now a true amazon;
I actually like my scar. I am happiest with my body now because I know
that I have new life. The fascinating thing for me is that Jesus was
resurrected to a new life - not the old one recycled. He was not raised
from the dead looking as he did before and his new life included his
scars. In the same way our bodies tell our stories.
'I think your whole life shows in your face and you should be proud
of that.'
Lauren Bacall
If we celebrate who we are, treating ourselves and others with respect,
we can live with integrity and wholeness, enjoying life in all its
fullness.
My self-image and attitude have changed in other ways. A Somalian friend
said that I am the only European woman she has met with an African
bottom. I used to despair of ever having sleek hips but thanks to
Jennifer Lopez and, more importantly, Precious Ramotswe of The No. 1
Ladies Detective Agency, I now value being 'traditionally built' and
enjoy taking up some space!
It is up to each of us to realise that our body is a temple of the Holy
Spirit and to treat it accordingly, enjoying it, loving it and realising
how precious and unique it is. Above all we must be fully alive to the
present moment and the gift of life we are given.
Zam Walker is a URC ordinand living in Barrhead, who will move to a
joint ministry in the Brighthelm Centre and Brighton URC in September.
She would be happy to hear from anyone interested in the way cancer
changes body image.
zam.walker@googlemail.com
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