Seeing for myself: Heidi Hollis explains how her life has been transformed by a personal encounter with Jesus

Heidi Hollis explains how her life has been transformed by her conviction that she has personally encountered Jesus, been visited by angels and received divine healing of a chronic disease

From childhood into adulthood I carried around my wandering doubts concerning God and the importance of even knowing more about Jesus aside from his sacrifice and the stories I’d read. Sure I believed God existed; I figured something was responsible for this blue marble full of life. Then when God took my mother away from me at the ripe age of seven, I began to question some of his decisions. In fact, I only took to praying so I could say hello to my mother, whom I felt was held hostage somewhere in the heavens. Yet it was from my heartache at that young age that my relationship with God began.

As a young adult, I had essentially joined the crowd, even gathering my own opinions in dismissing the claims of so many people that Jesus had made himself personally known to them. How fantastical that seemed. I wrote my suspicions into a book I was publishing, saying that essentially Jesus wasn’t “into” making any special appearances. These reports, I felt, were just entertaining the egos of individuals delusional enough to believe them.

Wrong!

Before print and before I put my eternal foot in my mouth, God let me off the ethereal hook. Jesus came into my life, and when I say “into” I mean God spiritually and physically came to me and gave me a whole new makeover as to what I experience in my once bubbled life.

On four tremendous occasions Jesus came forward, twice in a vision and twice in a physical sense. When I used to hear the word “vision” I thought of hocus pocus weirdos who smoked odd things until a hallucination came forward. Now I relate visions to the many beautiful stories written in the Bible of visiting messengers of God. The first time I saw Jesus, I had just laid my head onto my pillow for an afternoon nap when it felt as if I’d fallen through it. I saw a man in the distance who walked up to me as I buried my face in my hands in a silly sort of manner. He greeted me then asked, “Do you know who I am?” I stuttered, “Y-yes.” “If you knew who I was, you would not hesitate to say it.” And I didn’t.

This is how I began to develop a streak-clear view through the window pane of faith.

When I looked up at him I saw his flowing robes,  shoulder length hair and shadowed face created by the light behind him. When I shared with others about this encounter, many people asked how I knew it was really Jesus. My reply to this doubting question was, “I could have been blind and seen that it was him. Every cell in my body screamed his name!”

To imagine that even the smallest morsel of you could recognise the Son of God, where you feel no doubt in you; there truly are no words to describe it.

There was no question people could ask me that I hadn’t thought of myself with my prior skepticism toward other Jesus encounter claims. Jesus told me not to be discouraged by what others say, and I never have. He asked me to work for him, and I accepted. One of my first tasks was to rewrite that chapter in my book, explaining how I was so wrong about placing limits on Jesus – the Limitless One!

Jesus came to guide me on three more occasions, though he never actually left. He healed my soul and even my body of a chronic disease that I had for 12 years. My faith wasn’t at a high rung on the ladder at the time, and in fact I didn’t believe in what Jesus could still do today, even though I had seen him for myself. Why would he heal me in this way when so many suffer and are not healed? I have no true way of knowing; this is just my story; all I can do is tell it. It happened, dumbfounded my doctor, saved my quality of life and extended it. I'm lucky for it and I hope I am doing God justice in sharing about it. 

The manner in which I was healed is a perfect example that still while lacking faith, God can smile our way with purity. No one is perfectly flawless in their approach to God, but God is flawless. Surely God loves all of us, whether we have faith or not. In my own case I didn’t believe Jesus was healing me even as he was doing it. But is it possible faith can help get you there? I think that's fully possible.

God opened my eyes and heart to the utter beauty of his presence and forgiving love. One of the more personal lessons for me was never to question what he is capable of doing even for “insignificant me”.

Clarity of faith can be all of ours, and not solely through holy encounters (though don’t think it could never happen to you – I’ve been there). Keeping steadfast in our intentions towards God, explaining our anguish, being honest about our confusions, smiling at his creations, looking toward him for guidance and asking questions – these are some of the things that help draw him closer for us to see him and for him to see us. It’s a “never give up” type of attitude we need to grasp, and allow ourselves to be what we are made to be: each of us a uniquely charismatic, flawed, gasping-at-wonders, loving, angry, laughing, jabbing, hugging, fleshy creation!

I’ve now learned to keep fully open to God’s answers – remembering answers won’t always turn up in the shirt pocket we may be accustomed to reaching into for them. When I questioned God’s actions in taking my mother, he gave me another mother. When I doubted his son appearing, he came to me. When I tried to pray with more clarity, he sent me an angel to teach me how the angels prayed in pictures.

With faith comes patience, with patience comes God, and our seeking him helps us see him and his marvels much clearer. Building faith can take time, but once we have reached our peak God is there at the mountaintop, where slipping can be human but where God’s hand is always open and his grip firm enough to help steady our footing at all times.

Heidi Hollis is the author of Picture Prayers: The Journey to Picture Perfect Prayers and Jesus Is No Joke: The True Story of an Unlikely Witness Who Saw Jesus. Visit her at:
www.pictureprayers.com and www.jesusisnojoke.com

This article is featured in the September edition of Reform.

To read the full article Subscribe to Reform